This is a continuation of the discussion of Elder Oaks’ “Selfless Service” talk. Here is the original discussion. The post to which this writing is responding is found here.
To borrow from Elder Oak’s talk: He who lives only unto himself withers and dies, while he who forgets himself in the service of others grows and blossoms in this life and in eternity. It seems like it is a paradox, but this is only because of the way this was said. Unfortunately, this phrase is self-contradictory. I believe this was done intentionally because paradoxes are a way to grab people’s attention. A contradiction will often cause people to examine something more closely. “If I live for myself I’ll die, but if I don’t then I’ll live… so if I want to live, I must not live for myself, but the only way to not live for myself is to seek death, so to get death I must live for myself, but living for myself means that I don’t want death…” If one tried to logically sort out this paradox he would end up chasing a never-ending contradiction.
I think that Elder Oak’s and President Hinckley’s use of the famous “forget yourself” quote aren’t intended to be taken in extreme. Perhaps “forget yourself” isn’t intended to be interpreted along the same lines as “hurt yourself.” I believe it means, “You can’t see what is in this for you, so stop looking; just work.” Elder Hinckley on his mission was unable to use his Self Interest to determine his most Self-Interested (if we understand by that, “self beneficial”) action, and so his father told him that his faith and obedience should motivate him to continue his service when his self interest had failed as a motivation.The result of acting on those principles would be ultimately in his self interest, even if he couldn’t see that now.
Another quote from Elder Oak’s talk: Those who are caught up in trying to save their lives by seeking the praise of the world are actually rejecting the Savior’s teaching that the only way to save our eternal life is to love one another and lose our lives in service. This is not as paradoxical and makes more sense. Jesus is a bit more consistent here than was President Hinckley, but the important thing is what the intended audience will learn. The meaning of a message is relative to the vantage point of the listener.
What does it mean to lose our lives in service? Perhaps we are intended to understand “lose our lives” to have the same meaning as “forget.” This is the sort of phrase that Ayn Rand rages against in Atlas Shrugged. I hope that my readers may share insights into this phrase. I believe that it refers the notion of a life’s description, or entry in the Book of Life: instead of that entry being filled with descriptions of individual desires and pursuits, perhaps the entry under “me” will be filled more with the names of those I have served.
The ancient evil of greed shows its face in the assertion of entitlement: I am entitled to this or that because of who I am—a son or a daughter, a citizen, a victim, or a member of some other group. Entitlement is generally selfish. It demands much, and it gives little or nothing. Its very concept causes us to seek to elevate ourselves above those around us. This separates us from the divine, evenhanded standard of reward that when anyone obtains any blessing from God, it is by obedience to the law on which that blessing is predicated.
Selfishness, in its gospel terms, is distinct from the idea of Self Interest. More than being concerned with the welfare of this life God has given, this evil selfishness is concerned with itself at the expense of any around. It is the motive of the free-loaders and looters. It is the motive of Jimmy in marrying Cheryl (Atlas Shrugged). It is to be addicted to one’s self, afraid to think of anything else.
Self interest, distinct from selfishness, is a crucial element of Love and is explained in the second Great Commandment of the Savior. One definition of love, in fact, would be to have self interest in others. I believe God has this: He feels about us the way we ought to feel about ourselves. He sees our potential, our quality, and our virtues. He sees what we are capable of becoming. Let us know, certainly and unshakably, our own worth. And, by the Grace of God, let us have the same power of discernment as we look on the value of each and every soul around us.